The experience of adoption and permanency for constellation members creates lifelong, intergenerational issues, complexities and opportunities. Trauma, neglect and multiple attachment disruptions have a significant negative impact on a child’s social, emotional, cognitive and physiological development. What are children supposed to do with all the pain, grief, distress, hurt, rejection, shame and anger they carry inside their bodies and minds? The lingering effects of early relational (attachment) trauma and neglect can last a lifetime, unless all of the adults, both parents and professionals, assist the child in healing from the effects of these traumatic losses and experiences. Learning the complex skills of identifying what we feel, why we feel it and communicating those feelings to someone who cares, is even more important for a child with complex trauma. Supporting the whole family means that we, as professionals, must continue to evolve our knowledge base, resources and supportive services to ensure that parents and families who are in the ‘trauma trenches’ with children/youth have what they need to feel successful in their parenting journey. Parents and families provide belonging, rootedness and attachment security - it is the relational permanency that is the healing mechanism for the child. The family is the intervention (therapy). It is our job to attune to the needs of the family and parents who are providing the most intensive form of relational healing that a child/youth can experience.